For those who may or may not know, Hurricane Ike left a massive amount of destruction in its wake. My cousin sent this PowerPoint to me, and I hope I can get it to work for you. Just to cover my butt, I have no idea who put this together, but I’m sure several (if not all) of the pictures are the copyrighted property of someone. Since I don’t know who all of you photographers are, I wanted to say that I am only posting this in the interest of public information. I don’t make a dime on this, trust me. If any of you know who the owners of these photos are, send me the info, and I’ll happily edit this entry and add their names with my hearty thanks. Lastly, if I’ve used your photo and you don’t want me to include it in this PowerPoint, please inform me, and I will gladly remove it with my apologies.
A Better Mother May 12, 2008
and though they are good mothers and love their children, I know that I will be better.
I will be better not because of genetics, or money or because I have read more books but because I have struggled and toiled for this child.
I have longed and waited.
I have cried and prayed.
I have endured and planned over and over again.
Like most things in life, the people who truly have appreciation are those who have struggled to attain their dreams.
I will notice everything about my child.
I will take time to watch my child sleep, explore and discover.
I will marvel at this miracle every day for the rest of my life.
I will be happy when I wake in the middle of the night to the sound of my child, knowing that I can comfort, hold and feed him and that I am not waking to take another temperature, pop another pill, take another shot or cry tears of a broken dream.
My dream will be crying for me.
I count myself lucky in this sense; that God has given me this insight, this special vision with which I will look upon my child that my friends will not see. Whether I parent a child I actually give birth to or a child that God leads me to, I will not be careless with my love.
I will be a better mother for all that I have endured.
I am a better wife, a better aunt, a better daughter, neighbor, friend and sister because I have known pain.
I know disillusionment as I have been betrayed by my own body.
I have been tried by fire and hell many never face, yet given time, I stood tall.
I have prevailed. I have succeeded.I have won. So now, when others hurt around me, I do not run from their pain in order to save myself discomfort.
I see it, mourn it, and join them in theirs.
And even though I cannot make it better, I can make it less lonely.
I have learned the immense power of another hand holding tight to mine, of other eyes that moisten as they learn to accept the harsh truth and when life is beyond hard.
I have learned a compassion that only comes with walking in those shoes.
I have learned to appreciate life.
Yes, I will be a wonderful mother.
This poem kind of conveys how I currently feel.
Please understand that I’m not knocking those of you fortunate to have given birth without any hint of infertility. In fact, any infertile who says that she wouldn’t happily shave her head to not be infertile is lying her ass off. However, in the efforts of finding that ever-elusive silver lining, I’m of the mind that infertility will make me a much better and appreciative mother than I would have been if this hadn’t happened to me.